Why the World Cup kicks the Super Bowl´s Ass

1. Commercials don´t interrupt the whole fucking game. Sure, a lot of these guys make less than a kindergarten teacher, but at least Bud Light doesn´t chime in every 3 minutes to try to convince you that their beer doesn´t suck. (It still does.)

2. The men don´t wear mattresses on their shoulders. Tougher, manlier, and all-around hotter. Rawwwwr. And the sweat makes their uniforms stick to their chests…

3. No cheerleaders. It turns out women can do more than make sandwiches stand on the sidelines spelling the word “Go”.

4.  The way choosing a side makes you sound kind of racist. Remember that time [insert country here] lost the war? Don´t feel afraid to remind them if they beat your country.

5. The excitement of wondering if Diego Maradona is going to collapse from a cocaine overdose again. No worries, Fidel´s on his speed-dial.

6. They´ll use any part of their body to stop the ball. Scoring a goal with your head, fuckin´ right!

7. The players actually run. If you waddle and weigh 400 lbs, get off the fucking pitch. That means you, Maradona.

8. It lasts a whole month long. That´s what she said.

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s